


Does it bother anyone else that someone else has your name?

by MontyKarl



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Denial of Feelings, Dreamsharing, Fluff, High School, Josh is Sad, M/M, Multi, Soulmates, Tattoos, magic?, other pairings only briefly mentioned, tyler joseph is a nerd pass it on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-19
Packaged: 2018-05-01 01:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5187545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MontyKarl/pseuds/MontyKarl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At 18 you will register your name and that name will appear on your soulmate.</p><p>Fic title from Forest by twenty øne piløts</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What's in a name?

Josh turned over and stared at the illuminated numbers of his alarm clock once more. 11:59. He was shaking. 

3...2....1...

12:00.

The clock switched over and nothing big happened, but Josh was still shaking. He was officially 18 and later today, granted he got some sleep, he was heading first thing to get registered.

Josh isn't really sure when his obsession started; it was maybe when he first asked him mother about his father's name tattooed on her wrist. He would ask her over and over to tell the story of how they met and how they were soulmates. He thinks maybe it was when his older cousin found their soulmate while they were out together and Josh was almost left behind in their rush to be together. Josh started to get antsy earlier last year especially, when Patrick's soulmark showed 'Pete' in bold lettering on his shoulder. Patrick was beyond embarrassed and only told Josh at first because he wasn't even sure himself if he was bisexual yet.

Patrick also hadn't been old enough to register himself, so he wasn't even sure if his soulmate would like guys too, but rules were rules. Josh was hoping he'd be a lucky one and get his soulmark before his 18th and then be able to immediately start looking, but his skin remained a blank canvas.   
12:14. He should sleep. In the daylight he'd be able to go and register himself. He'd been practicing the way he wanted his name to look for years, wanting it to be perfect for his soulmate. He knew that when he finally signed the ledger and received his ID card his name would appear on his soulmate and all he'd have left to do was wait for them to register themselves.

Of course, some people chose not to register at all. Sometimes orientations didn't match up, or they lived miles away or states or countries (though rare, it did happen). Josh felt his heart race as the thoughts of 'what if' seeped in again and he shoved them off, hoping for some rest before the big day.  
______________________

He had been one of the first few people in line before the doors opened at the registry offices. He was still shaking, if not worse than before, but Josh was determined.  
He filled out the appropriate paperwork, gave his other identification, and waited. And waited, and texted him mom to assure her he was okay and he'd be home soon, and he waited. 9:53.

"Joshua Dun." He jerked up from his phone and stood, walking quickly towards the attendant. They led him down the hall and into the records room. The ledger stood before him, the attendant was a smiling young woman with the name 'Victor' and tight script on her neck. 

"Alright, big day huh?"

Josh nodded and stared at the book on the table.

"First off, just first names as is tradition." She rolled her eyes, obviously annoyed by this as much as anyone else that went looking, "Please write clearly as there is only one shot at this."

Josh stared back at her, trying to remain calm, "Please sign your legal birth name, here is your pen and your number, once you are finished please return this to the front desk and good luck, Mr.Dun."

The haughty attendant handed him the heavy pen and left him in the room. He stared at the next available blank space on the ledger book and raised his pen.

j

"Shit." It was lowercase, he had already fucked everything up, his hand kept shaking as he wrote.

os

H

Josh stared in horror at what he'd managed to do, he was planning on 'Joshua', but after that? josH would have to do. He lifted the pen and watched the ink burn red before seeping into the page in a faded black as though it had been there for years.

He hastily left the room, dread filling the pit of his stomach. He returned his pen and turned in the number and waited in the designated area, only he wasn't sure how long this time. Eventually his number was called and he was given his ID badge with the same 'josH' signature he'd written before upon it. He slid it into his pocket instead of proudly displaying it as he had intended, and rushed into his car and headed home. He made it a few feet inside before he realised he was crying.

"Josh, is that you hone-" Josh's mother stopped in her tracks as she rounded the corner and saw him standing in the entry. "What happened?"

She rushed over and pulled him into a tight hug, "I just-I had been practicing so long mom and I-I messed up my own name."

She pulled away, looking shocked, "What do you mean? Did you misspell it-"

"No, God no...I just..." He had managed to stifle his tears and pulled out his ID badge. His mother just smiled lightly at him.

"Maybe it'll make it easier to find yours?" Josh hadn't thought about it in that light and almost felt better about his mistake. "Now c'mon, I didn't get to make the birthday boy breakfast and you need to eat."

He let his mom lead him to the kitchen, trying not to think too hard about things.


	2. Countdown

Josh kept his ID in his secret hiding spot with is other important things (a shoebox in the back of his closet), he decided not to wear it until he got his soulmark, and maybe not even then because 'josH'? Really?

Fall came and the leaves changed and his skin remained the same.

He knew sometimes soulmates could be up to 10 years apart in age and again he pushed these thoughts away and focussed on finding a part time job and his schoolwork.

  
He'd managed to get a job helping in sales at a local Guitar Center three days a week by the end of November. It was a nice enough job, his coworker Debby was fun and she would show Josh her soulmark of 'Jenna' whenever he'd asked about it. She seemed to not be too worried about finding them. Josh didn't know how anyone could feel so unhurried about finding a soulmate, Josh had to force his mind onto other topics just to not think about where he'd most want his mark to show up, knowing they would appear where your soulmate first touched you. Most were on hands and arms, some unfortunately on the face. He was hoping for something common and not anything strange like his butt or...worse.

December 1st, 7:00am. Josh was getting up to get ready for school.

9:15. Josh was trying not to fall asleep in class.

1:12. Josh was eating lunch.

4:21. Josh was looking at snapchats from Brendon and rolling his eyes at the stoner jokes.

6:34. Josh was eating dinner with his family.

8:15. Josh was stepping into the shower before he started to wind down for the night.

8:17. Josh was looking for his body wash that his sister liked to move around.

**Tyler**

On his knee, well just above it, a dark bold name was sitting.

8:19. Josh was almost concussed as he rushed to get out of the shower and go text his friends and take photos of the name. He didn't even really bat an eye at the male gender of the name, he'd been pretty comfortable with being bisexual since he was 16 and he was pretty sure his parents knew.

He posted a slightly blurry picture to Instagram.

it's finally here!!!! #soulmark #tyler #soulmates  
__________________________________

Backtrack. June 18th 2:34pm.

Tyler was changing into swim trunks to go out with his friends. He was pulling them on when something black on his upper thigh caught his attention.

josH

What? Tyler's heart began beating out of his chest.

No. Nononononono.

He cancelled swimming on his friends, he felt sick suddenly.

He didn't swim the rest of the season. He avoided looking down when he changed or showered.

He wore nothing but skinny jeans and leggings even in 90 degree weather.

He avoided talk about soulmates for a good few months, only going to register to keep his parents from thinking he was even more messed up than he already felt.

Ever since he was young he'd liked the idea of finding his soulmate. He'd imagined she would be pretty and blonde like his neighbor Jenna. He was hoping as the years went by that it would be her name when the time came. When she turned 18, she refused to let him see her ID. When she finally got her mark and it wasn't his name, (he still doesn't know who it is, she won't say) he offered to get hers tattooed anyway. She punched his arm. They were better off as friends anyhow.

However, standing with a heavy pen in his hand as he carefully wrote his name, pressing too hard to keep from smearing the ink, he started to realise why people didn't register.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah i went ahead and posted some more ahhhh


	3. Hello

Josh was ecstatic for the next few days. He wore shorts for the first couple of days even as the windchill outside dropped and the frost set in. On the 5th day wearing shorts his mother scolded him and made him put jeans on before leaving the house for work.

Josh sat on his bed and carefully ripped the jeans, just above the knee before sliding them on. **Tyler** proudly on display.

  
His parents were only slightly surprised it was a boys name. Honestly Josh couldn't care less that it was a guy, he was just too excited it was finally there. His destiny, his happiness, his forever set into his skin like it was always meant to be there.

Josh found himself drifting off in class and at work and during dinner just fantasizing. He wondered if Tyler was short or tall, if he liked the X-Files, what his favorite flavor of ice cream was. Josh had to admit, he was smitten and he didn't even know if this guy lived in the same country as him. All he knew, from what his mother could tell him and what he could Google about soulmarks is Tyler must be a bold person because of how dark the mark was and confident because of the neat writing and how large the signature was compared to Josh's own. Josh also would wonder if he was good enough for Tyler, if he was attractive enough or not too weird.

It was extremely distracting. Josh was supposed to be stocking a shelf full of piano stands and then walking the floor, but instead he was sitting on a box and lightly tracing his fingers over the black lettering on his knee through the hole in his jeans.

"Hey, Jish, some guy needs help getting something off the back wall and I'm too short, go help." Josh pouted at Debby, but proceeded to go be helpful.

  
He meandered around small children playing on the keyboards and out onto the main showroom floor when he got a chill up his spine. His heartbeat started to beat slightly different, he felt...something. He knew, he knew his soulmate had to be here right now. He started walking again slowly, feeling the strange sensation grow stronger as he approached the guitar wall, he started walking faster and faster almost running.

He tripped, right into someone, knocking both them and a display of guitar straps to the ground.

"I'm so sorry!" Josh scrambled to get up, his knee had dug sharply into the other persons thigh and they were still laying on the ground with a slightly pained expression.

"It's uh-it's alright..." A pretty blonde girl who was standing nearby attempting not to laugh bent down to help the guy back up.

"I uh, yeah I was just in a hurry to uhm....help a customer get something?" Josh covered, the strange feeling subsiding but a small tingle was left in his knee, probably from the fall. He unconsciously reached down to readjust the hole in his jeans to expose the name.

"TYLER!" Josh jumped, looking at the blonde girl who had just screamed the name of his soulmate.

"Oh..uh yeah, that's my soulmark?" Josh ventured. He glanced back at the girl who looked kind of shocked, and the guy who was nervously fidgeting.

"Did you say you were here to help a customer because I think I'm that customer?" He finally mumbled to Josh.

"Oh uh...yeah, I'm Josh how can I help?" Josh asked, switching back into his work personality, trying to ignore the fuzzy feeling in his knee.

"Uhm...that one." The guy pointed, he was tall enough to reach it himself, probably taller than Josh by a couple of inches, but was still being nice about the 'Please ask for assistance' sign placed on the wall directly next to the...ukulele. Josh smirked and plucked it from the wall, when he turned back only the nervous guy was standing there, the blonde mysteriously missing.

"Okay well uh, you can play around with that in the booth over there, and if you need any more help or wanna see something else just let me know." Josh concluded, prepared to walk away, but something tugged at him, "Sorry again for uhm, falling on you again, what did you say your name was?"

"I didn't." He said curtly, something akin to anger tinging his words, and Josh felt his winning salesman smile falter just before the man spoke again, "I uh...my name's...Robert?"

Josh felt his heartbeat skip for a second, not in a good way, just stop and suddenly start back up as he witness the blonde approaching them again looking dazed.

"Okay uh, well Robert, if you need anything just holla atcha boy." Josh said, immediately hating himself and blushing and turning around to walk swiftly back to the keyboards.  
_________________________

"A ukulele?" Jenna deadpanned as Tyler pulled into the Guitar Center parking lot.

"It's my birthday money and I finally decided what I want okay? Don't judge me, this is why we're not soulmates."`

Jenna just rolled her eyes and rubbed at her upper arm where Tyler now knew was right where a very curly written 'Debby' sat in her skin, they had both finally shared their soulmarks with each other. Jenna was nervous about it, but after seeing Tyler's (and laughing at the clumsy writing) she felt better. She wasn't sure herself about her orientation, but Tyler? He was straight, okay friend?

Tyler wandered around the shop, Jenna on his heels as they approached the wall of guitars, banjos and....two small ukuleles. Tyler reached out to grab one and Jenna slapped his  
hand.

"Ow, why?" She pointed at the 'please ask for assistance' sign.

"I'm gonna go find someone who works here..." She walked away just as a short redhead with a Guitar Center lanyard approached him.

"Hi there! Can I help you?" Tyler nodded and pointed to the wall.

"I need to see that uhm, ukulele." She glanced up and looked back at Tyler.

"Well, I'm short and I'm going to go get my coworker, he can get that for you, just one moment." She hurried off in the other direction as Jenna walked back over to him.

"I couldn't find anyone."

"Oh, this one girl just went to get someone who can get that for me..." Jenna nodded and then her eyes widened.  
Crash.

Tyler was staring at blurry brown hair and ceiling tiles, his thigh was tingling in pain where someone's knee had dug in.

"I'm so sorry!" The guy who had knocked him over apologized as he stood up.

"It's uh-it's alright..." Tyler mumbled, kind of distracted by the rip in the guy's pants that he was face level with, he could see 'Ty-' through it and his heart sped up. Jenna was laughing as she tugged at his arm to stand him up.

"I uh, yeah I was just in a hurry to uhm....help a customer get something?" He watched the employee straighten his shirt and then the hole in his jeans and-

"TYLER!" Jenna shouted, Tyler felt faint, there it was, right there on the Guitar Center worker's knee.

"Oh..uh yeah, that's my soulmark?" The guy responded, confused. Tyler had to cover this.

"Did you say you were here to help a customer because I think I'm that customer?" He finally mumbled, not really trusting his own voice.

"Oh uh...yeah, I'm Josh how can I help?" Tyler felt his palms start sweating. _joSH_.

"Uhm...that one." Tyler pointed to the wall, watching as Josh, THE Josh, went to get the instrument down. Tyler shoved at a shocked Jenna and whispered, "I need a minute okay?"

She nodded and speed walked in the other direction, a huge grin threatening to spread across her face. Tyler felt sick. Josh handed his the small ukulele with a smile that made his eyes crinkle and that didn't help.

"Okay well uh, you can play around with that in the booth over there, and if you need any more help or wanna see something else just let me know." Josh looked like he was finished, but then he stopped and addressed Tyler again, "Sorry again for uhm, falling on you again, what did you say your name was?"

"I didn't." Tyler snapped he didn't mean to, but he was terrified. He saw the smile fall away from Josh's face and felt compelled to fix that, "I uh...my name's" COME ON THINK OF SOMETHING "...Robert."

"Okay uh, well Robert, if you need anything just holla atcha boy." Josh said, and the name felt wrong and this whole thing felt weird, but at least Josh was leaving.

"Robert?" Jenna startled Tyler out of his reverie, still staring at the spot where Josh had been, and clutching the ukulele.

"I uhm-It's technically my name."

"Anyways....I think I just found my soulmate."

"What?"

Jenna just shook her head and pointed to the girl Tyler had spoken with earlier, "I think it's her, but she isn't wearing her ID or a name tag?"

Tyler felt dazed, he was still shaky and he just said, "Look....we'll talk about this later."

He tripped over the rack of guitar straps that were carelessly left on the ground as he proceeded to check out while Jenna went to the car. It was too much of a coincidence to meet their soulmates today at the same place no less. Tyler blatantly ignored the familiar 'Jenna' on the girls' wrist as she rang him up.


	4. customer service

Weeks pass and Josh can't fight the nagging feeling that he's missing something. This guy he knows in his biology class named Brendon gets his soulmark 'Sarah' written is a cute curly script and finds her the next night at a football game, she's a cheerleader and he's a band geek from rival schools. It makes the school paper. Josh goes to work and stocks things and helps people and waits patiently. He tells himself that he has to be patient. He feels like he's missing something.

Josh decides to dye his hair, he lets Debby pick and ends up looking like fresh cotton candy. It isn't what he was missing, but he likes it all the same. His mother scolds him, but in a lighthearted way, saying that making himself stand out might help him find his soulmate. He knows he's missing something.

Josh finds himself staying after his shift the following Friday and playing around with one of the electronic drum kits they have on display. He's not even sweating when he realises he's being watched. It's the ukulele guy he'd knocked down a couple weeks back.

"I-I'm sorry, you're just..."

"Oh, sorry, you wanna try?" Josh asks, pulling off the connected headphones that hid the actual drum effects. The guy shook his head, Josh couldn't remember his name, but it didn't matter because it wasn't Tyler.

"No...uhm, I was just...I was wondering if you guys have any books for uh...learning tabs on the ukulele?" 

"Oh well, I'm off the clock but..."Josh looked around for Debby or his manager Mark but found no one. 

"I'm sorry."

"No hey, it's all good." Josh grinned and stood, walking towards the front counter, expecting the other to follow. "I can still-"

Josh turned around and found the other boy was gone, he heard the front door chime as it closed.  
________________________

Tyler was struggling, with a lot of things, but mostly figuring out chord progressions on the ukulele. When he realised that his brothers or sister weren't going to let him on the computer anytime soon he reverted back to old fashioned methods and decided it'd be easier to get a physical book anyway. He was halfway to Guitar Center before he remembered.

joSH.

His leg itched, he turned his radio up louder to drown it out. 

He felt his heartbeat speed up ever so slightly as he entered the store. He started towards the front counter until he heard a loud rhythmic tapping from the other end of the store and followed the sounds. He wanted to curse himself for being drawn to the noise as soon as he saw him, his eyes were closed and he was focused on the beat he was drumming out. His hair was...pink.

joSH.

Tyler's mouth felt dry. Josh opened his eyes and smiled.

"I-I'm sorry, you're just..."

"Oh, sorry, you wanna try?" Josh asked, and Tyler suddenly had difficulty remembering what he was even here for.

"No...uhm, I was just...I was wondering if you guys have any books for uh...learning tabs on the ukulele?" 

"Oh well, I'm off the clock but..." Josh trailed off, glancing around. Tyler couldn't stop staring at his knee, his name carefully covered up today. He felt strange.

"I'm sorry."

"No hey, it's all good." Tyler was immediately blinded metaphorically as he glanced back to Josh's face by his smile. Tyler's hands began to sweat, his heart skipped, it was horrible. Josh stood and began walking away towards the front desk area. "I can still-"

Tyler couldn't do this. So he ran.  
________________________________  
Winter passed by cold and uneventful after that. Christmas came and went. New Years. The frost began to melt but the cold clung to everything. Josh felt cold.

His knee was always cold. Josh was almost desperate enough to start wearing his ID badge everywhere. Valentine's Day was a week away. Patrick had plans to meet Pete, they found each other by mistake online, arguing over some band in the comments section of Youtube. Josh's sister got her soulmark early. 

Josh started wearing his stupid ID badge.


	5. familiar faces

Tyler was progressing slowly with his ukulele, he'd finally managed to get the book on a day that Josh was nowhere in sight. Jenna was listening to him run through the same chords for the umpteenth time when she finally groaned, "I'm hungry and this is really getting annoying."

Tyler sighed, wanting to get the notes perfect, but his stomach growled in agreement. 

"Fine I'll stop. Taco Bell?" She made a face at him, but was too hungry to argue about his dietary choices.  
________________________________

"Tyler!" Josh's heart raced when he heard the employee call out the name for the order. He jumped and ran, leaving his quesarito half enjoyed as he slammed into someone near the counter. Josh hurried to stand up, helping up none other than the same guy he'd fell on before.

"Oh man, we have got to stop meeting like this." Josh joked, the other guy looked terrified.

"Tyler!" The employee called again. The blonde girl from before looked expectantly to them both. Josh looked around, his heart beating double time, waiting for the person to come get their food, just to see. He scanned the room and came back to himself to find that the guy and girl were both gone. He turned to see the employee at the counter shrug and toss the bag of food away.   
________________________________

"I can't believe you are going to let me starve because you're afraid of your soul mate!" Jenna griped.

Tyler pulled into the Chipotle parking lot before responding, "I am still feeding you, and to be fair you ran away from yours too."

"I'm not even sure she was...y'know...okay?" Jenna trailed off, sounding almost sad. Tyler focussed himself on the more important matters at hand, like deciding if he wanted a burrito or a bowl.

_________________________________

Josh stayed in bed on the 14th. He stayed in bed the next day too. He was definitely sick. He'd read somewhere that you can die of a broken heart if you don't meet your soulmate. He felt like he was dying. His mom said he was being overly dramatic.

He pushed himself to get out of bed the next day and make it to work. 

6:52.

Only a few more minutes left and Josh was free to go home and wallow in his sadness once again.

6:53.

The door chimed, a customer walked towards him. The same guy.

"Hi there, how can I help you?" Josh meant to go get someone else to help him, because last time he ran away from Josh and also Josh wanted to go home. Suddenly, he didn't want to go home.

"Oh...it's...hi." The guy mumbled.

"Josh." Josh supplied, pointing at his name tag, his ID hung just underneath.

"Robert." the guy replied, almost too quickly. Josh nodded, finally connecting the name back to the face, even though it didn't feel right.

"That's right, Robert...So, how can I help?"

"Oh uhm, "He held up the ukulele he must have purchased before, "I broke a string..."

"Oh, uhm....I'm not sure if we have any for that model in stock? I can check, if not we'll have to order them..." Josh turned to his computer at the desk and attempted to find the right strings, coming up short. "We can order some and have them in in a few days if you want?"

Robert nodded hastily, looking away from Josh like he had something weird on his face and was horrible to be looked at. Josh wanted to feel offended, but for some reason he felt kind of serene at the moment. He placed the order and gave Robert the total and estimated arrival time. "I need your number."

"Uhm, my what?" Robert asked, looking panicked and Josh laughed.

"I'm sorry, like...so we can call you when they're here."

"Oh yeah...right." Robert quickly rattled off his number and left, the door's chime echoing in Josh's mind.

"Someone's got a crush." Josh jumped, glancing away from the door and towards Debby.

"I-what? I do not." He tried.

"Yeah you do. You're here like 15 minutes past your shift and you begged me stay so you could leave early last weekend. What's his name?"

"Robert." Josh answered immediately, a sour tone in his voice. Not **Tyler** , he thought.

"Oh..." Debby sighed, "Well, I mean....he's still kinda cute..."

"I'm fine waiting for my soulmate, okay?" Josh said, trying to make Debby leave him alone as he went to clock out. He definitely didn't have a crush on Robert. He didn't like how cute he looked when he was nervous or how his voice cracked when he finally spoke up or how he managed to pick one of the weirder instruments they sold and blushed when Josh smiled at him. No, he didn't have a crush at all.

____________________________

Josh was avoiding the small box in the corner of the desk area when he arrived for work next. He knew what it was. He knew he needed to call his customer for pick up, but he just couldn't when he knew how cute the guy was and how awkward he was. He'd probably end up saying his name wrong or mispronounce Guitar Center, or he'd burp while talking or he'd call the wrong number, the possibilities were terrifying and endless.

"Please just call him for me okay?" Josh begged and Debby sighed, taking to store phone and dialing the number. 

She waited a moment before handing it to Josh and saying. "He didn't pick up." She began to walk away, knowing she hadn't hung up.

Josh heard a faint, 'leave a message after the tone for...' "Wait hey, Debby not cool-" BEEEEEP, Josh hurriedly put the receiver to his ear, "Uhm, Hi Robert! This is Josh from Guitar   
Center, your strings are here and ready for pick up, thank you bye."

Josh hung up the phone and wanted to punch Debby.   
______________________________

"You've been listening to that same message all day." Jenna sounded bored as she watched Tyler replay the message again. 

"But...Okay, but he called me Robert-"

"Because you told him that was your name."

"Yeah, but my answering machine says 'Tyler', how could he not have noticed? What if he knows and...and he thinks I'm like flirting by not saying my real name and I...."

"Just admit that he's cute dude."

"I'm not gay!" Tyler huffed. He repeated this to himself over and over like a mantra anytime the dark ink on his thigh would itch or he found himself thinking about how Josh played drums. He had enough to worry about senior year, basketball, his ukulele, scholarships, anxiety that came along with it all. He didn't have time for this too. 

Jenna just rolled her eyes at him as he pressed the button to replay his messages, 'one saved message- 'Uhm, Hi Robert!.....


	6. hello again

Tyler was dreaming, he'd managed to make himself fall asleep finally, somewhere around 2am. His dreams were usually dark and dreary, reds, blacks, grayscale.  
This dream was sepia with vibrant pops of color. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he felt.....soft. He felt calm and content.

Then he saw Josh, looking confused and sad, staring at his knee. **Tyler**.

His own name echoed into his thoughts and he shivered. Josh looked up suddenly in his direction and he woke up.

The sun still had another hour before it was up. Tyler scratched the itch on his leg and rolled over, trying not to think about it.

______________________________

"I swear I had a dream with him okay!" Josh insisted, his sister just stared at him.

"I don't think you can dream with your soulmate." She replied, looking at the name on her elbow. Josh sighed.

"I'll have to ask mom....but I swear he was there? I couldn't see him though." Josh was beyond frustrated by that concept.

His mom hadn't really heard about dreaming with your soulmate, but Josh had managed to find a couple articles about it on the internet. Mostly about how to dream with your soulmate, but it was something that had to be worked at and not just something that usually happened. Josh almost felt special, but then he remembered that he still had no idea who Tyler was.

Patrick and a couple others had invited him out to see a local band play, he hadn't heard of them before, but he was off work that evening and in need of a distraction.  
Josh was unsurprised to find Patrick attached to Pete when he arrived at the venue and broke away from their group almost immediately to sit by himself in the corner, playing absentmindedly with the hole in his jeans.

There was a moment in between the opener and the main band that Josh felt the air change. Not just because of the sweaty bodies or vape fog, but something felt different. It felt like his hair was standing on end and his blood was rushing to his extremities too fast. He stood up to go outside, needing some sort of relief from this feeling and walked right into-

"Robert?"

Robert froze, dazed that he'd once again run into Josh.

"Oh, hi..."

"You haven't been by to pick up your strings yet." Josh found himself playfully pouting, his stomach twisting at the same time. He really felt bad flirting with Robert when **Tyler** was out there, but when he was around he found it hard not to.

"Uhm, I got them earlier today actually..." Robert looked away towards the band that was setting up. 

"Oh, are you here to see them?" Josh tried, pointing towards the band that was setting up, wanting to keep the conversation alive.   
Robert shook his head, "I'm here because my friend Mark got hired to take pictures of them playing...but they're not really my thing."

"Do you wanna like, go get some coffee or something then?" Josh rushed out, wishing he could staple his mouth shut. His heart was beating erratically and Robert looked just as taken aback. "Like just as bros, just hanging out, since this band is lame? Or we could get Taco Bell, I'm always down for some T-Bell..."

Robert nodded slowly, "I love Taco Bell."

"So is that a yes to my uh bro-date?" Josh knew he was blushing, face probably matching the pink of his hair. If it weren't for the lighting and Robert's skin being slightly darker than his, he'd think the other guy was blushing too.

"Totally....bro?" Robert said back and kind of giggled and Josh kind of wanted to die. Robert ran to his friend and told him that he was heading out, before returning to Josh.

"Is it cool if we take my car?" Josh asks, keys already in hand as he stood next to the vehicle and Robert nodded.

"Yeah, Mark was my ride so like...yeah." 

The car ride was almost awkwardly silent, but Josh managed to get Robert to talk to him about his newfound ukulele skills. They trailed off to order and picked back up talking about local bands they liked and other music they listened to.

"I kind of want to start a band." Robert declared between sips of Baja Blast.

"That's sick dude, I was in a band for like three days before we broke up due to musical differences." Robert laughed and Josh felt like he'd eaten squirmy baby kittens instead of nachos.

They joked about starting a band together, 'drums and a ukulele?', and they talked about how they managed to go to different schools and only actually lived a few blocks from each other. Josh learned that the blonde girl was Jenna and she and Robert had been friends forever. Josh felt like he had a lead weight on him when Robert talked about how he wished Jenna had his soulmark, but she didn't.

"So....do you have your soulmark yet?" Josh asked, trying to be cool about his situation and not cry at a Taco Bell with a guy he barely knew.

Something flickered in Robert's eyes and he ran a hand through his hair, mussing up the short but kinda fluffy tuft of a fauxhawk, "No....not yet."

Josh sighed deeply, "I've had mine for a few months now and I still haven't found them....you wanna see?"

Josh didn't wait for an answer, he just stood up, standing on one leg to lift his knee for Robert to get a better look.

"It's uhm....that's a dudes name."

Josh felt his proud smile waver as he sat back down, "Yeah....I guess I'm bisexual? I really....I don't know, I just know that Tyler's my soulmate y'know? So...." Josh trailed off awkwardly under Robert's gaze.

"It's just weird. Like, I'm straight and I have no idea how I'd react if I got a dude's name." Robert looked uncomfortably away as he spoke.

Josh shrugged and felt a lump forming in his throat. What kind of luck did he have to deserve this? 

Robert tried to carry the conversation somewhere else, back to music, and they talked for awhile longer until the Taco Bell employees informed them the lobby was closing and they had to leave. Josh dropped Robert off at his house and took the long way home.


	7. i drove the whole time

Tyler avoided Jenna for a few days, knowing she'd find out he went and hung out with Josh. He just couldn't say no, it really bugged him. As it turned out, Josh was actually a really cool guy and they'd probably make alright friends.

He wasn't going to push it though. In fact he was pretty sure he'd upset him, but he'd panicked when Josh started to talk about him soulmark.

4:15pm.

'unknown number: hey this is josh, you wanna hang out later? hmu dude'

Tyler stared at his phone, his hand was shaking. He turned his phone off and went back to his homework.

_________________________

"Debby NO!" Josh shouted, he was inside one of the soundproof booths that he was supposed to go and clean, then he heard the lock click shut.

When he looked out of the window he saw Debby with his phone and he wanted to die. He had told her that he and Robert hung out and she suggested they do so again. Josh insisted that Robert was straight.

By the time Josh's manager let him out of the booth, Debby had already looked up Robert's number and sent a text asking to hang out again.

"Don't make me make you two turn your phones in before you clock in, now get back to work."

"Yes sir, Mr.Hoppus." Josh affirmed, glaring at Debby.

"Alright dad..." Debby said, rolling her eyes and walking off to the registers.

Josh waited for a reply regardless. It never came.

____________________________

"Jenna NO!" Tyler shouted, watching her quickly type back and respond to the weird text that may or may not have been from Josh. Even though it said his name. Tyler had managed to ignore it for almost three days.

"Just hang out with him okay! You owe it to yourself to at least get to know the guy who's supposed to be your soulmate."

Tyler cringed, "Stop-don't....don't' say that."

"Well he is, I don't think anyone else would managed to write their name like that." Jenna attempted to keep herself from giggling, Tyler immediately regretted showing her his soulmark.

"Fine....but this means you have to go talk to that chick from Guitar Center."

"What? No way.....like I said it's probably not even her." Jenna looked affronted until Tyler's phone buzzed in her hands. "You guys are going to see the new Marvel movie at 7 on Friday."

Tyler groaned and ignored the way his heart stuttered.

__________________________

Josh shows up at Robert's house at 6:59. His hands are sweating on the wheel and he keeps wiping them against his legs, his knee, the soulmark itches. It's been itchy lately, and he can't find anything about itching other than some weird embarrassing things and he's pretty sure he's not pregnant. He turns his radio up after he texts Robert that he's there and loses himself for a moment, air drumming against his dashboard.

He barely notices the faint figure at the passenger side door, tapping lightly at the glass. Somehow he does, he couldn't have possibly heard the tapping past the bass in the song, but he unlocked the door on instinct and let Robert in.

He was fidgeting, and had a red beanie pulled low over his head, almost obscuring his vision. Josh tried not to think about how adorable it looked.

"So....what's up dude?" Josh asks, driving away towards the movie theater, it's getting dark early still and there are clouds on the horizon threatening rain.

  
Robert shrugs, glancing out of the window at the passing cars, "Not much....school and stuff?"

Josh laughs lightly, "What kind of stuff?"

Robert finally looks in his direction and Josh can't help but stare back, thankful he's at a stoplight because he feels like he's glued to the spot for a moment until Robert once again breaks his gaze. Robert tells Josh about basketball and how it's not really his thing anymore, but his parents want him to love it. He talks about how he's started playing around on an old Casio he found in the basement and figuring out the ukulele more. Robert finds himself rambling about his brothers and his sister and he tells stupid stories and Josh soaks in everything. Robert is smiling lightly, gesturing with each new word and Josh watches from the corner of his eye. He misses his turn, they keep driving.

  
Josh doesn't even realise they aren't where they're supposed to be until Robert speaks up, "Uhm...and hey, aren't we uh...where are we?"

Josh looks around and realises they're probably in the next town over and the movie they were meant to watch ended a half hour ago.

"Oh man, I didn't even pay any attention-"

"It's all my fault I'm so sorry, if I had just shut up-"

"No, it's okay dude, I like listening to you talk, it's cute." Josh closes his mouth immediately and bites his lip to keep anything else from falling out. His chest feels like someone is grabbing his sternum and squeezing, his hands are sweating again as he turns them around and heads back for town.

Robert stays silent for awhile, going back to his quiet fidgeting self, and Josh still can't help watching the way the streetlights illuminate and diminish his view of Robert.

  
Josh pulls back into their neighborhood. 10:30.

He turns down the right street and knows exactly where Robert's house is without thinking, he gets a chill down his spine at the thought. Robert is asleep when he cuts the engine off, his face pressed against the glass small droplets of water sliding down outside the sleep breath fogged window.

Josh leans over and pressed his hand against Robert's shoulder, shaking lightly. the warmth from behind the Grouplove hoodie he's wearing is almost burning, and Josh momentarily feels like his hand is shocked as he pulls it away. Then Robert is blinking awake and looking confused, his hat having slid down to completely cover one eye. He adjusts it and looks around to see his house.

"Oh..." Josh can't tell, but he's pretty sure Robert is blushing. "I'm sorry-I-"

"No big deal dude, we should actually try and catch that movie sometime maybe?"

Robert nods and mumbles something in agreement or a goodnight as he shuffles out of the car. Josh watches until he's safely inside before driving off, wondering how he managed to get himself attached to a guy whom A) has no interest in him and B) is not his soulmate. Josh drives home and after finally falling asleep,  has a strange dream about a tree house.


	8. set my soul on fire

Tyler isn't sure when, but at some point he and Josh became friends. Real, honest to God friends. They would text each other stupid pictures of cats and go to shows together, get lunch, see movies. It fell into a rhythm of them hanging out and talking about music and school and it wasn't anywhere near as awkward as the first couple of times, as long as they avoided talk of soulmates.

The most awkward it had been since they started hanging out more was when Tyler was invited to go bowling with some of Josh's other friends. He almost put his real first name on the screen and he missed every roll after that (all of them). Josh just laughed and offered to get the bumpers put up. Tyler was so busy trying to not blush or react to Josh's natural flirtiness that he barely noticed that they had pretty much excluded his other friends as they played together. The night ended with Josh's friends making bad jokes and insinuating things that made Tyler's stomach feel weird and fluttery and made Josh's cheeks tinge pink, but it at least took away from Tyler's horrible game.

Tyler's also not sure when it happened, but he started to not respond so much to 'Tyler' as he did to 'Robert'. He even wrote it on a paper once before turning it in and had to make something up to his teacher as to why he did that. It was awkward. Eventually, even his own mother would get confused when she'd say his name over and over across the dinner table and he wouldn't look up until his full name was called, ("Tyler Robert Joseph, answer your mother!").

Jenna would tease him about it, she started calling him 'Roberto' and 'Rupert' and other similar names just to mess with him. He knew that she was quietly upset with him for lying to Josh though, she would often point out how much time Tyler spent talking about Josh and the way his eyes lit up when she asked about Josh or how he'd casually mention 'Oh, that's Josh's favorite too' when they were out getting ice cream or something. Tyler hated to admit it, but he loved spending time with the now blue-haired boy.  
He loved listening to him go on about his alien conspiracy theories, about weird customers at work, about his sisters and his friends and his hopes and dreams. He'd even secretly loved to listen when Josh started to go on about finding his soulmate, with a sad gleam in his eyes, fingers always, _always_ toying with the rips in his jeans. Tyler refused to admit much else, even to himself. He was straight (right?) and he didn't need that.

It wasn't until one night, when he finally couldn't keep his eyes open any longer as he texted Josh back and forth, that he had another strange dream. At first he was just swimming in a warm feeling and then shapes started moving around, finally it appeared it was him and Josh, but he was pretty sure they were naked. He was also pretty sure he'd never been more turned on, and that Josh was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen or heard and he wanted to touch him so badly. Only, when his fingers neared the soft skin so close, _so close_ , the dream faded and Tyler woke up awkwardly hard and confused.

His phone buzzed a few minutes later, 1:23 AM.

Josh: 'I just had the best dream about my soulmate i think'

Tyler turned his phone off with a small shudder and forced himself back asleep.

_______________________

Josh was complacent with his life at the moment. He was almost done with school, he was drumming part time with a friend's band while their drummer let his broken leg heal and he had a new best friend. He was pretty sure that even if Robert never liked him back, he was perfectly alright just being friends. He had never had someone understand his weird thoughts so well, much less someone who could one up him on them or challenge them. 

He never felt so comfortable just sitting outside of a venue after a local show and talking to someone, long after the cars had packed up to go home. He'd never felt so safe to share his darkest fears or his wildest dreams with someone else and wanted more than anything to hear all of Robert's as well. Josh would let his thoughts wander off when he had quiet moments, where he'd usually have daydreamed about his soulmate, but instead found himself wishing that Robert was his soulmate..

Josh would push these thoughts away and remind himself to be patient, because **Tyler** would be there for him someday...right? He looked down at the can of Coke in his hand and printed on the side was 'soulmate' as if to mock him and he suddenly wasn't thirsty anymore.

He threw the can away, thinking about how today was a particularly 'sad thoughts day' when Robert texted and asked if he was free to hang out, and without hesitation Josh said yes. 

Robert was over in a few minutes, he'd brought Red Bull and his hesitant smile. They sat in the living room for awhile, Josh's parents were out at some recital his sisters were in, so they snacked and talked about everything and nothing as usual.

"What!? You've never seen any X-Files?" Josh felt like he'd been lied to this whole friendship so far.

"I mean....parts of episodes?" 

Josh immediately drug Robert to his room and pulled out his box set that he'd received last Christmas, putting the first disc in and turning his tv on. Josh hopped onto his bed as   
the familiar spooky theme started and patted for Robert to join him. 

Half a season in and Josh felt his eyes drooping with the warm weight of Robert against him. It wasn't until another episode ended that he realised that Robert was asleep and he looked soft and nice and Josh's heart ached.

"I wish you were my soulmate...." Josh mumbled, unthinking and Robert immediately sat up, looking at Josh only mere inches away.

"What?" Josh's heart sped up, he didn't realise Robert wasn't actually asleep and he felt so stupid.

"I uhm.." Robert shifted and sat up straighter, staring right in Josh's eyes like he was trying to burn into his soul. Josh shivered and Robert leaned in, messily pressing their lips together.

Josh had never felt such a fire inside his chest, he had never felt like the world had dropped away from him. He'd kissed two people in his entire life and it had never been like this. He felt like he was falling, but then he realised that Robert was leaning against him and he was actually falling back against his bed, his arms reaching out instinctively to pull Robert closer. Feel his heartbeat. Erratic. In Sync. Amazing.

Robert's lips were so soft, so delicate and so enticing as they moved against his own. Josh felt like he was melting into the bed, shivering with every movement, gasping quietly as he felt one of Robert's hands slip accidentally underneath his shirt, just lightly brushing against his skin. 

Then the warmth and the flames and the intensity were gone like they'd never been there.

Robert was stumbling away from the bed, wiping his mouth off with the back of his hand, a disgusted(?) look on his face. Josh felt like he was being crushed and he sat up, reaching out for nothing as Robert ran. 

Josh heard his front door slam and he flinched, his heart was still racing and now his head was pounding. He felt like he was bruised all over, he turned the tv off and curled back up on his bed.

8:12.

Josh cried himself to sleep.


	9. im sorry (intermission)

Tyler was watching the show through lidded eyes, not bored of the plot, just comfortable and warm and relaxed. Tyler had been having a pretty bad day, he woke up with a migraine and traces of the nightmare he'd been dreaming and spent most of his day attempting to learn a few different songs on his ukulele and failing. With frustration had come pain and tears and he tried to write it out and failed once again, smearing ink on his hands and not much else. 

There was a nagging feeling inside him to talk to Josh and eventually he'd found himself texting and asking to come over. He definitely didn't notice the way his heart sped up when Josh said yes, or how quickly he'd gotten his stuff together and ran out of the house without even telling him parents where he was going.

Now, they were situated on Josh's bed, watching the X-Files, and he felt sleep try and overtake him despite the Red bull he'd consumed. He was just drifting in and out of consciousness, listening his and Josh's steady breathing fall into sync as he zoned out.

"I wish you were my soulmate...." Josh mumbled, and Tyler was sure he'd misheard. He sat up slightly, looking to Josh.

"What?" Josh's eyes widened, and Tyler couldn't help but note how adorable he looked when he was shocked, and that was strange.

"I uhm.." Josh faltered, and Tyler felt himself acting without thinking. He felt the soft puffs of breath against his own before his lips were pressed against Josh's and his head was swimming.

He felt like he was drowning and Josh was his life vest and he pushed closer and closer until he found himself laying on Josh. Tyler let Josh's responsive mouth work against his, light nips and licks over his bottom lip made his mouth fall open, inviting Josh to take whatever he wanted. Tyler felt himself slipping like he was sinking into the other boy and he tried to steady himself against the mattress. His fingers finding only warm skin, making Josh gasp against his mouth.

That was like a fire alarm, the sprinklers were spraying him with cold water and he was shocked. He was shocked at himself for what he had done and then he was running. 

Tyler kept running and then driving and wishing his car had a radio to blast out the thoughts inside his mind. He was hyperventilating outside of his own house. He was shaking. He was so, _so_ gay for Josh Dun and his crinkly eyes, his colorful hair, his stupid gauged ears and the way he laughed and the freckles he'd seen on his shoulders the two times he'd seen Josh shirtless and how nice his lips were even though they were chapped and how warm he was. He was so gay for Josh Dun.

_____________________

"You definitely need to tell him then." Jenna said, matter of fact as she stirred her frozen yogurt concoction together. They were supposed to be getting a nice healthy lunch, but frozen yogurt could be at least two food groups if you tried hard enough, right?

"I can't." Tyler knew he could, he could tell Josh right now, just call him and say 'hey, y'know i'm actually your soulmate?' Tyler knew how well that would go and he felt sick, staring at the untouched plain yogurt he'd gotten with sprinkles (Jenna's addition). Tyler hadn't even talked to Josh since the incident. He'd avoided almost everyone, except Jenna, who was practically unavoidable.

Josh was busy though, with school and work and drumming and so Tyler told himself that Josh would talk to him when he was ready. Tyler ignored the ache in his chest when he would check his phone late at night, unable to sleep and found no new messages. Tyler ignored the glimpse of the name on his leg when he changed clothing. He reverted to how he used to be, before he'd met Josh, with how he hid it to even himself. He focussed intensely on other things; he would play ukulele until his fingers bled, he would write until his hands were covered in ink, he'd even shoot free throws until he got 300 in a row. He'd ignore everything. He'd wait.

"You need to fix this." Jenna finally said, standing to throw away her empty cup. Tyler couldn't though, he couldn't fix this.

But maybe Robert could.


	10. Tyler

Tyler found himself outside of Guitar Center, waiting for Josh's shift to be over.

7:01.

A minute past and Josh comes walking out of the store, stopping dead in his tracks when he sees Tyler leaning against his own car.

"Hey." Tyler calls out as Josh starts to walk away, towards his car. He follows after him, stopping him just as he gets the door open.

"Hey..." He says again, dumbly, he hasn't seen Josh in almost a week and he immediately feels like his world is turning right side up when Josh meets his gaze, even though he knows he's shaking slightly and he's terrified.

"What do you want?" It stings and Tyler knows he deserves it.

"I need to tell you....something."

"It is that you're sorry?" 

"Mostly....yeah." Tyler responds and Josh snorts and looks away, "But I'm..i-I'm not sorry I kissed you? I'm just...really confused right now Josh and I-"

"Tyler!" Josh's head snaps up on instinct. Tyler feels dread settling into the depths of his soul, his friends Mark and Chris are walking towards him in the parking lot, "Tyler dude,  
it's been forever!"

Josh turns away from the approaching guys and back to Tyler, looking scared and confused, "Robert what-"

"Tyler, bro what's up?" Mark greets, nudging his shoulder against Tyler's own and he can't speak. His throat is constricting and Josh looks like he might cry. Mark's eyebrows  
crease and Chris hangs back, "Tyler?"

"Stop calling him that!" Josh shouts, catching everyone off guard, "Robert, why are they calling you that?" Josh's voice cracks and he looks like he might break if Tyler speaks.

Mark clears his throat, and Tyler finds his words enough to say, "Be-because that's....that's my name."

Tyler flinches and closes his eyes, he hears a car door slam and the engine ignite. Tires squeal. Exhaust fumes. Heartache.

"Dude...what just happened?" Tyler can't bring himself to explain anything, he feels like he might die. Like he's already dead. The voices of his friends are faint and echoing as he walks away from them, he isn't sure how he makes it home, but he does.

His thoughts are screaming and he wants to scream and he does, and he cries, and his mother comes and holds him, confused and scared and he lets her. He tells her, and she doesn't think he's wrong for having a boy's name as his soulmark. It's relieving and there's no relief.

Tyler falls asleep early that evening, out of exhaustion. He sleeps until daybreak and his mom calls him out of school. He stays in bed even though the sun is shining and Jenna  
has called him three times, it's not even noon.

He ignores it. He ignores everything.

__________________________

Josh is just leaving work, he'd offered to stay late and almost wishes he had when he hears him.

"Hey." Robert is standing at his car a few rows into the parking lot. Josh hadn't heard or seen him in almost a week and he wishes simultaneously that he had seen him sooner and never had to see him again. Yet, there he was. Josh ignores him and walks towards his own car.

"Hey..." Robert calls out, trailing behind him, of course.

"What do you want?" Josh is slightly surprised to find himself sounding scathing and parts of him wants to take it back.

"I need to tell you....something."

"It is that you're sorry?" Josh asks, not ready to hear a half assed apology about how he didn't mean to kiss him.

"Mostly....yeah..." Robert responds and Josh snorts and looks away, "But I'm..i-I'm not sorry I kissed you?" Josh feels something in his chest stir, but he still won't look at Robert, "I'm just...really confused right now Josh and I-"

"Tyler!" Josh's gaze immediately lands on two guys walking towards them, shouting his soulmate's name, "Tyler dude, it's been forever!"

Josh turns away from them, he feels panic and anxiety pushing it's way into his body, "Robert what-"

"Tyler, bro what's up?" One of the guys come closer in his greeting and Josh feels his hands shake, holding his keys. The guy turns directly to Robert and says, "Tyler?"

"Stop calling him that!" Josh shouts, not even realising it was his own voice for a moment, feeling distant from himself, Josh pushes out his next words through the fuzzy haze in his mind, "Robert, why are they calling you that?" 

The guy clears his throat, and it's quiet for a moment before Robert(?) responds, "Be-because that's....that's my name."

Josh feels his world crashing down around him. He feels betrayal coursing in his veins and he had never been so confused in his entire life. He doesn't wait for an explanation or another apology as his vision blurs like his mind. He gets in his car, still shaking and he's not sure if it's anger or something else, and he drives.

________________________

School ends, basketball ends, summer starts and Tyler feels like he's falling apart. He only leaves his house to run errands for his mom or maybe once a week to see Jenna, he tries to look for a part time job and fails. He tries to look at the letters from colleges and fails. He's a failure.

He wakes up everyday aching, feeling incomplete. He misses the way Josh would smile at him and his stupid jokes and how careful he spoke when Tyler was having an off day. He's missing him, he feels missing.

He has dreams of setting his tree house on fire. He dreams of cotton candy hair and soft skin and wakes up crying.

He spends all of his free time (there's a lot of it) in his parents basement, making noise just to make noise. He finds the song book he'd bought months ago for his ukulele and flips through it, determined to learn every song just for something to do.

Then he sees it, and he feels something he hadn't felt in some time. Hope.

And then he knows. Robert can't fix anything, because Robert was mostly a lie. Tyler however? Tyler feels like there may be some chance to fix this yet.

He stays up that night and replays chords and strings until his fingers give out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOW COULD TYLER POSSIBLY BE THIS MUCH OF A FRICK UP OH MAN  
> alright one last chapter (MAYBE TWO) there may not be any smut in this fic after all I'm sO SORRY but heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey who knows....hmu @j-shler on tumblr and tell me what you feel and stuff....


	11. Endings/Beginnings

Josh is so done, and there are no puns he can make to feel any less done with everything. He's picked up a few more hours since school let out, he ignores his parents questions about school and life and why he hadn't been hanging out with that Robert boy anymore.

Because Robert didn't exist. It was all a lie.

For the first few days after the incident he'd lied to himself, hoping it was a fluke, waiting for a phone call or a text that Robert was just messing with him.

Then he realised that Robert was Tyler, and that wasn't going to happen.

**Tyler**

He had tried to throw out all of his old jeans and wore the one pair of sweats he'd had left even after the summer's heat set in. He felt sick to his stomach when he saw the name on his leg and wanted to scratch it off of his skin. It still itched sometimes like his fingers when his phone buzzed.

Debby was quiet and calm but cautious around Josh. She stopped asking about Robert when he told her, she didn't know how to help. Josh felt himself ghosting around his life, watching himself pour milk and cereal and watching himself drive to work and watching himself struggle to sleep without any nightmares about trees and blurry faces creeping into his subconscious.

Josh felt hollow, more incomplete than he'd felt before he'd known, before he'd met Tyler.

He struggled to connect Tyler to the face he'd learned so well as Robert. To the stupid crooked smiles and stupid fuzzy faux hawk hair and stupid soft lips and it was stupid.  
Tyler was a stupid name.

Josh was told to go home after the third time he knocked over the display of guitar straps because he was too preoccupied with his thoughts to even watch where he was walking. He just nodded and clocked out, not really wanting to head home, but he didn't have anywhere else to go. He wandered outside slowly, hearing a quiet guitar as he neared his car.

No, not a guitar-

A ukulele.

Josh felt his veins constrict, his fingers twitched, he shivered in the warm evening air.

_'Wise men say....only fools rush in...'_

Josh turned around to see Rob- **Tyler** , standing there with his eyes squeezed shut, his hands working in time with his voice as he sang.

_'But I...can't help...falling in love with you.'_

Josh felt himself tremble, he couldn't look away from Tyler.

_'Darling so it goes...some things were meant to be'_

Josh felt overcome with the soft drawl of the instrument and the light lingering words and he couldn't believe his own ears or eyes or anything.

__'Take my hand....take my whole life too....'cause I can't help, falling in love with you..'_ _

"No I can't help....falling in love...with....you." Tyler's voice trembled, he lowered his instrument, his hands shaking and Josh knew he must be as well. Without a second thought, Josh was stepping forward, towards the other young man. Fear flashed against his mind for a moment as Tyler's eyes opened, but it was gone as soon as it had come and all there was, was Tyler. Not Robert. **Tyler.**

Josh found himself sliding his arms around Tyler's waist and pulling him close, their hearts were beating double time, and Josh could feel it against his own and knew he was meant to. It should have been an awkward embrace with the ukulele's tuning pegs digging into Josh's back but he didn't want to let go. Ever.

"I'm so sorry Josh...I was just...I was so scared and I-I'm so stupid." Tyler said, barely a whimper to Josh. Josh refused to let go, he knew deep down it would take awhile to trust Tyler with some things, but he also knew he couldn't deny Tyler anything. "I just-I missed you so much it hurt....Everytime I saw your name I-"

"I wanna see it." Josh found himself cutting Tyler off and he almost made a pathetic sound as Tyler pulled away slowly.

"See...see what?"

"Your soulmark...I-"

"Oh...okay...but uhm...I can't show you here?" Tyler gestured to the parking lot. He was blushing lightly, his hands were still shaking and there were Bandaids on his fingers. Josh wanted to kiss them better. He wanted to kiss Tyler.

"Where is it?" Josh asked, curious now, trying to think back to the first time they touched. Tyler pointed to his thigh and Josh bit his lip to keep from smiling as he remembered running into him, literally. Tyler laughed lightly, and gestured to the ukulele.

"I meant all of that...y'know? I-i know it's not my words...but...I meant it. Josh, I'm sorry I was so afraid of...liking you....but I can't imagine living another day thinking you hate me and hating myself for lying to you an-"

Josh moved to press his lips to Tyler's, shivering at the spark that came with the movement, and Tyler let him kiss him, and he didn't run away. Not this time. Never again.

6:23.

Forever began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALRIGHT WELL IM LAME AND THE END
> 
> No but honestly thank you everyone/anyone reading this okay, you guys made my month for even bothering to click on this!
> 
> I'm sorry it's not longer, ive been extremely stressed out (sick top reference) lately BUT i think im going to maybe write either an epilogue or a coda fic for this universe okay to like tie up any loose ends!!!
> 
> Let me know what you think either here or on tumblr @j-shler
> 
> thank you all again, stay alive, stay street |-/

**Author's Note:**

> im almost done writing this whole thing, but im posting it in parts in case i go back and add stuff. please comment and kudos if you like it and feel free to bug me on tumblr @j-shler.


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